God Led Us to Buy a House in a High-Risk Fire Zone and on a Major Earthquake Faultline

(Please read through to the end. The bottom line on this story is probably different from we you are expecting.)

Unexpected Wrightwood snowstorm in November

During the height of this summer’s California wildfire season, God clearly led us to buy a vacation home in the high fire danger zone of Wrightwood, California. As a bonus, our new house is also on the San Andreas fault. We learned about this property on a Monday, put an offer in the next Friday, and had it accepted three days later.

Are we crazy?

No, not really. Despite the breakneck speed and the risky circumstances, we immediately recognized this as a remarkable answer to several years of prayer. Both of our children’s families live in the Los Angeles area, and, since we live outside Atlanta, we have been seeking ways to be more involved in their lives.

Over the years, we thoroughly explored housing options in Greater LA, but the combination of extremely high prices and choking congestion left us seriously discouraged. Additionally, none of the areas we considered would have any draw for our kids, and we feared setting them up for guilt trips, making them feel obligated to “visit the old folks.” Furthermore, we hated the idea of leaving Marietta, GA, our charming city with a great small-town feel.

The Wrightwood house checks all the boxes:

• It’s in an attractive mountain town close to both families and is literally four doors away from one of our son’s best ultramarathon running buddies.

• Real estate costs in Wrightwood are about half of what they are in LA.

• Our vacation house creates a “home base” for family gatherings and also serves as a weekend getaway place for our children.

• This solution allows us to visit three or four times a year and yet remain fully engaged with our church and friends in Marietta.

I would say this whole experience is one of maybe half a dozen times in my life where God’s will was indisputably clear. 

You may think I’m relating all this to point to God’s great goodness to us. Certainly, this is an aspect of the story I’m delighted to tell. However, there is a far more important lesson here:  once God makes his will known, you must be all in with no looking back, regardless of the direction things ultimately take.

Our decision to buy the house set in motion hundreds of decisions, some of which took us well beyond our comfort zone. But if God was truly leading us, what else could we do but move forward and trust God?

As an example, there was a last-minute communications hiccup that left us without fire insurance for the first 18 hours we owned the house. Remember, we are in a high fire zone, and this was while the California wildfires were making national news every single day. Since we were 100% convinced that God was leading us to buy this house, that means everything – both positive and negative – that happened as fallout from this decision is, by definition, part of God’s will. Even if the house had burned down before the insurance kicked in, we would have to embrace that terrible outcome as part of God’s plan. In fact, ironically, it would probably have reinforced our trust in God’s sovereignty if it had been destroyed. What are the chances that a house that stood unscathed for 53 years would randomly burn down within a random18-hour period in 2020? We would have to believe that God had ordained that incredible timing.

Please don’t miss the significance of this perspective. If we are committed to doing God’s will and carefully and prayerfully seek to discern what it is, we must embrace all that results – even the parts we don’t like – as part of God’s plan.

In his awesome book Trusting God, Jerry Bridges drives home three powerful points about God:

He controls absolutely everything.

He love me completely.

He knows what he’s doing.

If you truly believe this, I defy you to come to any other conclusion than that we must embrace every downstream consequence of the decisions God leads us to as being part of his will.

My Story - Part 3 - My First "Jesus Moment"

Here’s a recap of the first two parts:  I had almost no religious input in my early years and was raised in a dysfunctional, emotionally abusive family. During my sophomore year of college, because of my flirtation with the paranormal, I attended a program that discussed whether contact with dead people was possible. To my surprise, the answer was “no,” but the program also included an entirely new “take” on Jesus’ life, death and resurrection – the fact that he did what he did to address everyone’s sin problem, making a vital relationship with him possible. Even though I didn’t fully understand what I was getting in to, I eagerly accepted the speaker’s invitation to commit my life to Christ.

One of the last things the speaker mentioned was that those of us who had just begun a relationship with Jesus should expect to see God begin revealing himself to us in the coming days. Again, I didn’t know what that meant, but that sounded pretty intriguing.

Let me provide some context for what happened next by explaining my roommate situation. Even though Art and I were pretty good friends during our freshman year, living together proved to be our relationship’s death knell. He was hyper-neat and, to say the least, I was not.  He was also a hypochondriac and was on a first-name basis with the entire student health clinic staff team. We quickly got on each other’s nerves, and I started complaining (loudly) to the other guys on the floor about what a kook Art was, even to the point of posting unflattering comments about him on our dorm room door. I know. That was very mature of me.

About three days after the program where I heard about a relationship with Christ, I was heading back to my dorm after class. I planned to take a quick shower before dinner, and as I approached our room, I saw that Art had posted a nasty comment about me on our door for all the world to see. I was furious! How dare he do that!

I ripped the note from the door, grabbed my towel and headed to the bathroom, fuming. The steam from the hot shower paralleled the steam boiling up inside me as I plotted how to retaliate for this public humiliation.

But then something happened.

In the middle of my anger, a new thought popped into my head. I realized I was the one who had begun the public “war of the door signs,” and Art was just following my example. So really, I was the one who brought this embarrassment on myself.

Then I had another very odd experience. I don’t know if technically it was a vision or just some kind of visual impression. I felt like I was up in my parents’ home’s attic rummaging through some old boxes of junk when I glanced up at the inexpensive metal wardrobe where we stored coats. It was up against one of the walls, and in my vision, I noticed that it was actually covering up a doorway that was barely visible behind it. I had never noticed this door before. In my mind, I pushed the wardrobe aside, opened the door, and discovered a large room behind the wall that I had been totally unaware of.

My very next thought was of the speaker’s comment from three nights prior indicating that if we trusted Christ to enter our lives, he would begin to show us things about ourselves and give us the ability to live in ways we never thought possible. “I bet this insight into my blame over my roommate feud is an example of what that guy was saying,” I thought. Jesus had just brought me into a previously unknown “room of my soul” and revealed one of my deficiencies. And, even though I had to face an unhappy truth about myself, I was delighted knowing that I could move on from here and that this whole Jesus thing was real.

That was fifty years ago, and since then, there have been hundreds and maybe thousands of instances where God has nudged me with specific ideas, insights, and promptings, all designed to make me gradually more like Jesus in ways I could not have dreamed of. Once in a great while, these experiences are fairly dramatic, but the vast majority are rather “ordinary.”

Please understand, I have a long way to go, but I can say that I bear almost no resemblance to that cocky, insecure, pseudo-intellectual high schooler from so many decades ago. Praise God! And I wanted to pass along to you my story as a testimonial about what God can do.

My Story - Part 2 - How It Happened

Last time, I described the climate of my early years – having essentially no religious background, being the smartest kid in my class, and growing up in an emotionally abusive family.

The loneliness of my high school years was partially reversed during my college years when I spent three summers as a counselor at a wonderful 4-H camp in Riverhead, NY. For the first time, I felt truly embraced by my peers, and their love of the natural world immediately rubbed off on me. This newly found fascination with nature converged with another aspect of my early years I didn’t mention last time – a strong interest in the paranormal.

All my Hungarian-born grandparents exhibited an Eastern European darkness that included an interest in psychic phenomena. I regularly perused a book on dream interpretation at my grandmother’s house. In high school, several friends and I got dramatic results using Ouija boards. During my freshman year of college, I took an Honors Program seminar on how to draw up astrological charts for ourselves and our friends.

At the end of my first 4-H summer, my enthusiastic embrace of the natural sciences converged with my fascination with the paranormal, and I started down the road of investigating White Magic. As opposed to Black Magic, which admittedly taps into satanic forces, White Magic appeals to goodness and the “light forces” of the universe. Despite its alleged positive focus, it too is ultimately satanic. Paul describes Satan as “an angel of light” in 2 Corinthians 11:14, and I was being sucked in.

This dabbling with the illegitimate supernatural is the context from which I wrote the October 15, 1970 letter to my brother referenced in my previous post. That’s where I said I had found God through nature.

A few weeks later, I started noticing posters going up all over the Syracuse University campus showing a slender, pensive-looking man with a shadowy, ghostly figure standing behind him. The poster was advertising a program called “Do the Dead Return?” This was right up my alley, and I was immediately hooked.

On the evening of November 10, 1970, I arrived at the venue early to make sure I got a good seat. The speaker’s talk leaned heavily on the experiences of the famous escape artist and magician Harry Houdini who promised his wife Bess he would try to reach back from the dead to contact her after his death. Despite ten years of Halloween seances after Houdini died, no contact was ever made. The speaker concluded that if the world’s most famous escape artist couldn’t cross the chasm of death, no one could. So, to my surprise, the punchline of evening was, “No, the dead do not return.”

He then indicated that, despite Houdini’s failure to return from the dead, there was one man who had done just that. And that was Jesus. The reason Jesus died, he explained, was to address the sin problem that afflicts every person. When Jesus physically rose from the grave, he decimated sin’s hold on us, and if we commit our lives to him, we can experience his love and forgiveness. Furthermore, over time Jesus will begin changing our lives and showing us how to live in ways we never thought possible.

I was absolutely riveted by this presentation. There were two things happening in my heart:

• I knew what the speaker was saying was absolutely true

• I knew this was absolutely for me

When he offered an opportunity to commit our lives to Jesus, I eagerly did. And that was the beginning of my new life. Praise God! This coming Tuesday, November 10 marks exactly 50 years since that wonderful night. If you happen to think of it, you might say a special prayer of thanksgiving on Tuesday, not for me, but for God’s grace in my life.

Next time, I’ll conclude the three-part recap of my story by recounting what I call my first “Jesus moment” that happened a few after that first November 10.

My Story - Part 1

In high school, I was not voted “Most Likely to Become a Jesus Follower.” In fact, I was a pretty unlikely candidate. Religion played almost no part in my extended family’s life. The closest we got was when we started attending a Unitarian fellowship – pretty much a fringe group. Instead of worship services, we participated in philosophical discussions and comparative religion exploration.

Although I learned a lot through this group, it was a net negative. I was always “the smart kid” who flaunted my intelligence, a tactic that did not endear me to me peers. And the Unitarian experience adding to my sense of superiority over my classmates who I felt were “trapped” by more conventional religious ideas. I thought anyone who really believed the Bible had to be academically deficient, and no one I respected intellectually took the Bible seriously.

I achieved my goal of graduating first in my high school class and entering the prestigious Syracuse University Honors Program. But I knew deep down that something was wrong. Unfortunately, my family was filled with dysfunctional and emotionally abusive people. Both my grandfather and my brother committed suicide. Beyond being a total non-conformist who distrusted virtually every societal convention, my dad also had a sadistic streak. One of his nicknames for me was “Idiot Child.” I can’t even put the other one in print. He abandoned our family financially and emotionally and almost never gave my brother and me presents, even for Christmas and birthdays.

This emotional abuse contributed to a deep-seated sense of inferiority. Despite being somewhat of a BMOC with numerous acquaintances in my many groups and activities, I had few real friends and spent most Saturday nights alone.

However, I experienced a refreshing breakthrough the summer after my college freshman year. As a counselor at a 4-H summer camp on the eastern end of Long Island, I felt, for the first time, embraced by a wonderful group of sharp, committed people. I was taken by their love of the natural sciences and immediately embraced nature as an ultimate value – perhaps the ultimate value – in life.

Because I had a college-related trip, I left midway through the summer. My last night there, I was unexpectedly inducted into a special honor society for outstanding counselors. Two things made this especially meaningful. First, I was totally unaware that this group even existed, so wasn’t “auditioning” for a spot. And, second, for one of the first times, I was being affirmed by my peers.

Then, the next morning, my fellow-counselors surprised me again by giving me a small gift for my trip. This unexpected gesture was especially significant since it was totally optional and stood in stark contrast to my dad’s lack of gift-giving.

For years afterwards, I thought that if I could relive any 24-hour period of my life it would be that evening and next morning when my friends embraced me for who I was, not necessarily for my accomplishments.

Recently, I came across a letter I wrote to my brother just a few months later. Here’s an excerpt:

You talk of having found Christ. Well I think I’ve found God through Nature. I can’t believe that I was able to stumble through 19 years without even beginning to appreciate Nature. Of course, my job this summer had a great deal to do with my new attitude.

Notice that I capitalized the word “Nature” as if nature is somehow divine. And in my mind, it was.

This letter was dated October 15, 1970 – just 26 days before my momentous experience of November 10, 1970. Tune in next time to find out just what happened to change my life.

How's Your Spiritual Muscle Memory?

The ability to perform a task without consciously thinking about it is called “muscle memory,” a term that originated with physical activities. Examples include a tennis player’s ability to instinctively hit a difficult backhand shot and a cyclist’s sense of when to shift to a higher or lower gear. All automatically. All without consciously thinking.

This concept also applies to areas other than athletics. As a blues harmonica player, when I am learning an intricate tune, I have to break down each phrase and play it over and over and over again. After repeating a phrase dozens or even hundreds of times, I reach an inflection point where suddenly the notes “just come out.” And even after not playing a particular tune for years, when I return to it, I’m amazed to find it’s all still there. This is muscle memory.

Muscle memory requires two things: 

• Deliberate practice of the underlying skill involved

• Lots of repetition

Although I don’t ever recall anyone specifically applying the concept to our spiritual lives, I think we can. Faithful Christians often meet both requirements:

• We practice significant underlying activities like worship, prayer, Scripture reading, fellowship, service, sharing our faith, etc.

• We typically repeat these habits a lot

As you read Jesus’ behavioral standards and respond to the Holy Spirit’s promptings in your life, you begin to “just know” what to do and how to act in particular situations. Here are some examples:

• Repeatedly reading and taking to heart passages like the Sermon on the Mount eventually drives their truths deep into your heart and into your actions.

• If you’ve developed the habit of giving part of your income to further God’s work, when you get an unexpected windfall, one of your first impulses will probably be to give some of it away.

• After you’ve seen God’s faithfulness through numerous crises, you may instinctively turn to him when new tragedy strikes.

Bottom line:  following Jesus becomes second nature, and it reshapes and transforms you.

As Paul says in 1 Corinthians 2:16, we have the mind of Christ. Although this doesn’t mean we’re infallible, it does mean our thoughts can become increasingly like his. This is especially true as we continuously behold as in a mirror (which is an example of muscle memory’s repetition requirement) the glory of the Lord and are transformed into his image through the Holy Spirit (2 Corinthians 3:18).

Three Ways to Go Wrong

Of course, we can mess anything up, and there are at least three ways you can fail to live in the joy of spiritual muscle memory:

1. Not practicing it all and failing in either the basic disciplines or the rigor of frequency

2. Going the opposite way and turning these beautiful spiritual disciplines into legalistic requirements

3. Becoming so “disciplined” that you crowd out the Holy Spirit, failing to draw on his power or respond to his promptings

The ideal blend involves:

• Regularly and joyfully participating in activities that build Christ-like character

• Not turning these disciplines into empty rituals

• Always being attuned to the Holy Spirit’s leading that might take you in unexpected directions

Routine and discipline are great, but you must always leave room for the Holy Spirit to redirect you as he sees fit.

So, back to my original question:  How’s your spiritual muscle memory?

Is Comparison Really the Thief of Contentment?

How many times have you heard that comparison will rob you of your joy? It’s easy to see how much others have and, consequently, become dissatisfied with your lot in life. In one sense, this observation is true. Our hyper-consumerized, FaceBook-fueled world bombards us with images of how successful, wealthy, good-looking, and popular everyone else seems to be. The problem, as Andy Stanley says, is that we compare our seemingly mundane lives to other people’s “highlight reels.” Everyone else’s life is amazing. Mine is not. Makes me feel like a schlub. 

Before the FaceBook world, we and many of our friends typically sent out Christmas newsletters, highlighting our families’ spectacular years. God blessed us with a couple of great kids, but there were a few years – especially the high school ones – that weren’t always awesome. Do you think we ever admitted that? Not on your life. All we spotlighted were our victories and successes. Eventually, I learned to read between the lines of others’ letters and figured out their lives maybe weren’t entirely unblemished either.

So, yes, we have been guilty of feeding into the “look how great our life is” trend. And we probably helped others’ contentment slip a bit by only presenting our “perfect lives.”

However, although it’s true that comparison can rob you of your contentment, comparison can have the opposite effect. Let me explain.

We tend to become jealous when we look up the “comparison scale.” But what happens when we look the other way, toward those less unfortunate than we are?

People on overseas mission trips are often shocked by being smacked in the face by abject poverty. In Manila, I saw entire families living in tiny cardboard and plywood shanties with raw sewage running past their “houses.” When our family went on a mission trip to Cuba when the kids were in high school, we worked with a church of about 200 members. I was stunned to realize that our family of four owned more vehicles – four cars, to be exact – than did all the members of that church combined.

I have friends from high school who have already suffered strokes, had hip replacements, endured cancer, and even died. I know people whose kids are hopelessly drug-addicted, mentally ill, or totally dysfunctional. And I even know people with kids who have committed suicide. What do I have to complain about?

When our daughter Stephanie was in high school, she took a prescription drug that resulted in second degree burns over two-thirds of her body. She spent 19 days in an ICU and nearly died three times. Nevertheless, as we saw other families in the ICU, we recognized how blessed we were. One young girl had lost a large part of her face to cancer. A one-year-old had rolled off a couch and was paralyzed for life. And some families never took their children home at all. When you look at people with circumstances far worse than yours, it’s easier to recognize how truly blessed you are.

My best friend Billy Burke describes himself as a “glass ¾ full person.” I love that! Of course, that’s technically illogical. The “glass ½ full, ½ empty” saying reveals whether your natural bent is toward the positive or the negative. What Billy is saying is that even when he sees a glass that’s only 50% full, his mental filter is such that he “reinterprets” the glass’s condition as even more positive than it really is. Nothing is robbing his joy!

So, even though comparison can steal your joy, having a mindset like Billy’s and looking “downward” on the comparison scale will actually remind you how truly blessed you are.

Should You Give More So God Will Bless You More?

The Health and Wealth Gospel – sometimes called the Prosperity Gospel – is a fairly recent bad doctrine that teaches God wants every believer to enjoy good health and financial blessing. There are two basic problems with this position:

• It ignores the many biblical passages that describe how God allows, uses, and even ordains suffering (e.g., John 16:33, Acts 5:41,1 Peter 2:20, 1 Peter 4:16)

• It contradicts the experience of both many Bible characters – not the least of which is Paul and his infamous thorn in the flesh – and many heroes of the faith throughout the centuries, starting with the 12 apostles, 11 of whom died martyrs’ deaths. None of them were healthy or wealthy.

It’s pretty easy to debunk the Prosperity Gospel, but there are variations that are less fallacious and, therefore, possibly more alluring. One example stems from the question of whether you should tithe based on gross or net income. I heard one minister somewhat glibly ask whether you would rather have God bless you based on your gross income or net income. This question implies a formulaic relationship between your giving and God’s blessing. Or, putting it another way, the more you give, the more you will receive.

I’m embarrassed to admit that back in the 1970s, I succumbed to a persuasive televangelist who urged his listeners to send him a “seed offering” to demonstrate we believed that God would multiply our generosity back to us.

Both the “gross vs. net” and the “seed offering” appeals are based on the assumption that you can coax God into acting more generously toward you if you act more generously toward him. Or putting it another way, you are trying to manipulate God by leveraging some kind of formula that says, “if you give ‘X,’ God will return to you ‘X plus something,’ or even ‘X times something.’” So, part of the motivation becomes giving to get.

Wrong, wrong, wrong!

Beyond this approach’s mixed motives is the fact that it tends to define God’s blessing primarily in financial terms. It assumes a “ledger” of “my generosity out and God’s reward in.” But God blesses in many ways we can’t measure. For example, just within the financial realm, if your car hadn’t stopped two inches from the vehicle in front of you when the driver slammed on his brakes, you might have racked up thousands of dollars of damages, increased insurance premiums, medical bills, and possibly legal expenses. Who knows how many “avoided costs” God has blessed you with that you will never know about this side of heaven?

And remember that God’s richest blessings are not always measured in dollars. Although he clearly rewards faithfulness and obedience, he often chooses to bless us with fulfilling relationships, joy, contentment, etc. How do you quantify those? Out of fairness, the Prosperity Gospel crowd sometimes acknowledges this, but they typically emphasize monetary return the most.

The longer I have walked with the Lord, the more I realize that we should do everything we do – live righteously, tell the truth, treat others with integrity, intervene to defend others, give generously, etc. – not because of any reward or return to us but because it’s the right thing to do. The moment you start giving more because you hope God will reward your generosity, you begin drifting toward becoming the puppet-master, trying to get God to do your will, not the other way around. And don’t forget, you don’t have anything in the first place that God hasn’t allowed you to have.

So just how should you give? Like everything else in the Christian life, you should walk closely with the Lord, seek his will for every significant decision, and joyously give however he leads you.

Which Body of Water Are You?

Dead Sea Salt Crystals

Last year, our church organized an awesome trip to Israel and Egypt. One of the many highlights was our visit to the Dead Sea, a distinctly quirky body of water. With an elevation of 1,412 feet below sea level, it boasts the lowest land elevation on earth. And since it’s 9.6 times saltier than the oceans, its water has an oddly oily feel and motivates the obligatory pix of people floating on their backs reading a newspaper. Dead Sea minerals are famous for their skin-rejuvenating properties, and we were delighted to discover golf-ball-sized clusters of salt crystals lining the shoreline. So, the Dead Sea is remarkable. But it has one problem.

It’s dead.

Because of the incredibly high salt concentration, nothing can survive in its waters, and no one lives along the shore.

By contrast, the Sea of Galilee is vibrant. During Jesus’ time, more than a dozen villages dotted its shores, largely because of its vital fishing industry. To this day, the Sea of Galilee is a living body of water that supports many industries, not the least of which is Christian tourism.

Both the Dead Sea and the Sea of Galilee are inland lakes, and both are fed by the Jordan River. So, why are these lakes so different from each other? Primarily because the Jordan River flows both into and out of the Sea of Galilee, while it flows only into the Dead Sea. In other words, the Sea of Galilee enjoys both an inflow and an outflow, while the Dead Sea has no outlet. This means that all the Jordan’s silt and minerals flow into the Dead Sea but have nowhere to go. So, the salt concentration skyrocketed over time as the water evaporated, resulting in a salinity that choked out all life.

The parallel to our Christian life is clear. If all we do is take in, and take in, and take in without a significant spiritual outlet, we become as dead as the lifeless Dead Sea. Many of you are currently serving in various ministry roles, but some of you may not be. One of the best ways to revitalize your spiritual walk is to begin serving others. Besides the obvious good it does for the recipients of your ministry, serving often forces you to stretch yourself to work outside your comfort zone.

I must say, some of my most exhilarating moments are when God uses me to have a profound impact on someone else. This is reminiscent of Jesus’ comment to his disciples after he ministers to the woman at the well in John 4. He had sent them to get some food, and they are surprised upon their return that he seems disinterested in eating. Referring to doing God’s will, he proclaims, “I have food to eat that you know nothing about.”

So, if you feel spiritually stunted, consider how much you’re giving out compared to what you’re taking in.

But there’s another lesson to learn from this “bodies of water analogy.” Some people have only a trickle for an inlet. Perhaps the busyness of life, or disappointment with God, or any number of other factors have caused you to withdraw from or become indifferent to God. If so, you should seek sources of solid input:  worship services, Bible studies, men’s or women’s groups, solid Christian books, retreats, etc. And then as you are personally revived, find appropriate outlets that fit your gifting, passions and schedule.

So, which are you? The Dead Sea, the Sea of Galilee, or a lake fed by only a trickle?

A New Twist on Answering One of the Most Common Objections to Christianity

How often have you heard this one? 

“You’re telling me that only Christians go to heaven? What about someone who was brought up in a different faith or people from remote areas who never even heard of Jesus? How is it fair for God to condemn them to hell?”

This may be the single most common objection to biblical Christianity. How do you respond to that?

First, let me outline a tried-and-true, solid answer, and then I’ll extend that argument a bit.

The first thing to recognize is that God is absolutely righteous (i.e., fair) in his judgment (Acts 17:31). Next, Paul deals with the exclusivity question in Romans 1. He begins by explaining that no one who rejects God’s existence can accuse him of being unfair because God’s invisible attributes,

namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him (Romans 1:19-20).  

In other words, absolutely everyone should know that God exists.

Tony Evans takes this thought process to the next step when he explains that

God will judge people according to the light they have. Thus, those who sinned without the law (Romans 2:12) . . . will be judged according to the law that is written on their hearts” (The Tony Evans Bible Commentary, p. 1119).

Or putting it another way, people won’t be held accountable for something they don’t know about. Essentially, this is an argument from the lesser to the greater. Let me explain.

For the sake of discussion, let me arbitrarily suggest there may be eight or nine “levels” of belief involved in becoming a Christian. (There may be fewer or more.) The first step might be acknowledging there is some kind of god. The second might be that this god has a personality (as opposed to being a vague “force”). The third point might be that this god created us. And so on. The final step is acknowledging my personal sin that can only be dealt with by Jesus’ sacrificial death on my behalf and committing my life to him.

Here’s why this is an argument from the lesser to the greater. The thoughts are getting more and more specific. If someone denies the very existence of God (a pretty “mild” belief), there is no way they will surrender to Christ’s lordship (a very demanding one). This means that even if someone has never heard of Jesus, they can be held accountable for having “rejected him” (Step 8) if they deny that God even exists in the first place (Step 1).

This is a well-known line of reasoning and can be quite effective. My addition to this thought pattern is to push it to its logical conclusion. If someone rejects the Christian message as “unfair” to people who have never heard or were brought up in a different faith, they are rejecting Paul’s teaching in Acts 17:31 and denying God’s fairness. “I would never condemn someone for not responding to something they never even heard of.” But stop for a minute. They are implicitly claiming that their sense of fairness is greater than God’s. Do you really think it’s wise to go there?

This may be one of those “slow burn” thoughts that someone has to mull over for a while before they recognize how presumptuous it is. Although I have only shared this logic with a few people, I have yet to have someone be willing to admit that they consider themselves to be more fair than God is.

What do you think? Does this argument fly?

What Does God Expect of You in These Tumultuous Times?

The last four months have delivered a global pandemic the likes of which we haven’t faced in over 100 years, a level of social turmoil unseen since the 1960s, and economic pressures that we rarely experience. Although it would be easy to get overwhelmed and depressed, we should remind ourselves that, as difficult as these circumstances are, God is still in control. Completely.

Some people take very seriously the world’s ills and feel obligated to address them. This is admirable. But don’t overdo it. In reality, the weight of the world is not on your shoulders. You’re not responsible for – nor are you capable of – solving every global calamity.

We each have 168 hours per week, and the majority of those hours are spent maintaining family relationships, working, and sleeping. Practically speaking, you must ask yourself, “What would God have me do?”

Perhaps Micah 6:8 answers this question better than any other Bible verse:

He has told you, O man, what is good;

and what does the LORD require of you

but to do justice, and love kindness,

and to walk humbly with your God?

                                              Micah 6:8 (ESV)

Doing justice addresses our public “face” and involves actively interceding on others’ behalf. Unfortunately, our world is rife with countless examples of injustice. Complying with this directive might require you to speak up when you see someone being mistreated, challenge a discriminatory policy, join a group actively promoting greater equality, or participate with any number of other worthwhile initiatives. And recognize that doing so may cost you personally and require sacrifice.

Loving kindness (or “mercy” in some translations) focuses on my demeanor, personal behavior, and interpersonal relationships. Are you gracious and compassionate? Are you dependable? Do people know they can count on you in a crisis?

Both of the preceding behaviors find their roots in living humbly, trusting God. He is God, and you’re not. He is all-loving, all-powerful, and all-wise. Even when you face terrible circumstances, God is still in control and, as promised in Romans 8:28, is working all things together for good for those who love him. Can you joyfully embrace that? I mean, can you really embrace that? I mean really, really embrace that? Doing so is evidence that you recognize your place and are walking humbly with God, even when you don’t like your situation. Never doubt God’s love. As Tony Evans reminds us, “If someone loves you enough to die for you, he is for you.”

If you are doing your best to comply with these three requirements, and if you are sincerely seeking God’s direction for which one, two or three of the literally millions of the world’s problems he is calling you to address, you can move forward, confident God is using you make a difference within your sphere of influence. You can’t do everything, but you can and must do something. Your job is to determine God’s will for you without deciding what he wants others to do. That’s between them and God.

If every member of the Body of Christ were to live according to Micah 6:8, collectively, we would be the hands and feet of Jesus and make a difference in this totally messed up world.

I encourage you to pray through Micah 6:8 to evaluate how well you are living up to God’s expectations. But please don’t do it out of a sense of guilt or compulsion. Instead, ask God how – in your own world – he wants you to do justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with him. And then enjoy watching him use you as an instrument of his grace.

When Life Trashes Your Trophies

I absolutely love the Focus on the Family ministry. And one of my favorite stories told by its founder Dr. James Dobson concerns his student tennis career. As a freshman at Point Loma Nazarene University, he saw a large, impressive trophy in the gym engraved with the names of each year’s most valuable tennis player. “I’m going to get my name on that trophy,” he vowed. And, sure enough, the name James Dobson was added in both 1956 and 1958.

Years later, as one of the college’s outstanding graduates, Dr. Dobson was invited back to address the student body. On the way to his speaking engagement, he spied, of all things, the coveted outstanding tennis player trophy peeking out of a dumpster behind the school’s gym. Years after Dr. Dobson’s triumphant accomplishments, someone valued that trophy so little that they literally trashed it. He took that as a lesson in keeping perspective on how much emotional investment to make in what really can be legitimate pursuits.

I had a similar experience. The American College of Healthcare Executives (ACHE) is a 40,000-member, international personal membership association for senior healthcare leaders. Each state elects someone to the role of Regent to represent them to the international organization, and once a year, each Regent gives a special award to just one outstanding senior leader in their region. Every year, I secretly hoped my name would be called. It never was.

Ironically, about nine years ago I was elected Regent for Georgia and found myself in the position to actually select the winners. Besides recognizing that the selection process is fairly arbitrary, I realized that, since there is only one award, many worthy leaders never receive that honor.

Once I completed my term as Regent, ACHE sent a beautiful certificate commemorating my service. When I started my consulting business in 2015, I turned an extra bedroom at home into my office. My wife Annette asked me if I wanted to get the ACHE Regents certificate framed to hang in the office. I decided that, since she, I, and the pest control technician would be the only three people who would ever see it, it wasn’t worth the $150 necessary to frame it.

This realization put a lot in perspective for me. First of all, I had strongly desired getting the award but never did. It’s OK. That fact doesn’t diminish my value as a leader or a person. Then, I was in the position to actually give the award to others and saw how difficult it was to single out just one person. This further made my non-existent award OK. And, finally, in the end, I decided the symbol – i.e., the Regents certificate – of my “prestigious” role of recognizing an outstanding peer was not even worth framing.

Now, I’m 100% in favor of setting goals, working hard, and applauding others for their accomplishments. But if what used to be Dr. Dobson’s treasured trophy ends up in the trash, and if a certificate that recognizes one of my more important professional accomplishments isn’t even worth spending $150 on, how much sense of self-worth should I place in those goals? (I was going to take a picture of the certificate to use as a visual for this article, but, frankly, I don’t even remember where it is.)

Scripture teaches that there are only three things that are truly eternal:  God, his word, and people. So, while I’m legitimately pursuing life’s important and necessary “human” goals, I should always consider to what extent I’m balancing those against the three things of eternal significance.

In recent years, God has led me into an extremely rewarding individual mentoring ministry with about a dozen younger men. God calls each of us to different ministries, and I encourage you to ask yourself if you are investing in what really matters in life:  your relationships with God, your family, and those he has placed in your path. These are life’s true trophies that will never be trashed.

God Has the Last Laugh

About a year ago, our church went on a fantastic trip to Israel. Even though it’s hard to select the most meaningful moment of the trip, one stands out as clearly the funniest.

One of our last stops was the ancient city of Jericho, made famous by that song about Joshua. According to The Cultural Backgrounds Study Bible, in Joshua’s time, Jericho was probably a small settlement surrounded by mud walls and may have been more of a military outpost than a civilization population center. Today, it is a relatively small city of about 15,000 people, and the area surrounding the major archaeological site bustles with shops, houses, and lots of traffic.

After lunch in a local restaurant, our tour guide ushered us to the historical dig where he provided many fascinating details about Jericho’s history. When he declared that some historians and archaeologists have determined that the city’s walls had already collapsed before Joshua arrived there, several of us “internally” raised our eyebrows. Of course, that statement directly contradicts the Bible’s account in Joshua 6. Since we are a polite group, no one publicly challenged his assertion.

Immediately following the tour guide’s history lesson, our church’s worship leader read the account of how Joshua took Jericho. Here are God’s instructions: 

March around the city once with all the armed men. Do this for six days. Have seven priests carry trumpets of rams’ horns in front of the ark. On the seventh day, march around the city seven times, with the priests blowing the trumpets. When you hear them sound a long blast on the trumpets, have the whole army give a loud shout; then the wall of the city will collapse . . . (Joshua 6:3-5).

The very moment he finished reading verse 5 about blasting the trumpets, a motorist just outside the archaeological site angrily laid on his car’s horn for about 10 seconds to express his displeasure with some perceived infraction. The timing was perfect! The whole crowd burst into spontaneous laughter over the convergence of Joshua’s horn and the modern-day one. It was as if God was saying, “Pay no attention to the comments about Jericho’s walls already having collapsed.” Those who know me know that I’m not one to read spiritual significance into every little life event, but this one was so clear that we couldn’t miss it. God had the last laugh that day.

Although I have utmost respect for and appreciation of scholarship, many historians and theologians clearly approach their work with skepticism about the Bible’s reliability, and their negative presuppositions shape their interpretation of facts. In fact, I wrote a book on this very subject. That’s a Great Question:  What to Say When Your Faith Is Challenged describes five mental filters that people who discount the Bible’s authority use to read the Bible to make it say what they want it to say.

But God will have the last word. Psalm 2 reads:

Why do the nations conspire

            and the peoples plot in vain?

The kings of the earth rise up

              and the rulers band together

              against the LORD and against his anointed, saying

“Let us break their chains

              And throw off their shackles.”

The One enthroned in heaven laughs;

              the LORD scoffs at them.  (Psalm 2:1-4)

As we look around at the chaos of our world, especially these days, we can be discouraged by the gains seemingly being made by those who deny God’s authority. But God is still God, and, as Psalm 2 declares, he has final say. And every once in a while, he does something to remind us that he is still in control. So, take heart! Just as he “laughed” through the Jericho car horn incident, some day he will also laugh at all rulers who are trying to throw off his shackles.

Your Influence Is Far Greater Than You Realize

Are you the same Glenn Pearson who learned to play mandolin while on staff with Campus Crusade for Christ in 1976 at Myrtle Beach, SC?

That was the opening line of an email I got from a guy named Tony Royko six years ago. He went on to say, I don’t know if you remember me or not as I am sure you have influenced thousands over the years, but I can say you had a wonderful impact on my life and I remember you well. Can’t wait for the reunion that awaits us in heaven.

It turns out we were, indeed, both on that summer beach project 38 years previously, and Tony was now a vibrant Christian with a robust faith. Cru organizes outreach projects for solid college kids to teach them to walk with God and share their faith more effectively. Every one of the students is a Rockstar in their own right, but some are more memorable than others.

I did remember Tony – after all, how many guys named Tony Royko can there be? – but barely. I had a vague mental picture of what he looked like, but since he was more reserved than the other students, I didn’t really recall much about him or our time together. And, despite his explanations, I never did fully understand how what I did or said so powerfully affected him. But it obviously was enough for him to track me down to thank me.

Tony’s email reminded me of an experience I had as a 12-year-old at church summer camp. I was one of the youngest campers, and my social skills were pretty underdeveloped. Consequently, I had a hard time fitting in with my cabinmates. After being there a week, I got sick and actually welcomed the chance to spend a day in the infirmary.

What really pushed me over the edge emotionally was the fact that, for some reason, my mom neglected to pack a dress shirt and tie for me, and I was the only kid at the Sunday church service without a tie. I felt like I had shown up for chapel in only my underwear.

Later that afternoon, we were going swimming in a nearby lake. By the time I boarded the bus, most of the seats were filled, so I ended up sitting on the floor in the back, crying. In case you’re wondering, crying in front of your middle school peers does little to boost your social standing. However, one of the older guys kindly came back and invited me to join him at his seat. He told his seatmate to slide way over so I could sit with them.

I can’t remember his name, what he looked like, or where he was from. But I do remember his little act of kindness, even these many decades later. And I calculate that the probability of him remembering this incident is 0.0004%.

These two stories illustrate how God can use us without our recognizing it. You can potentially have a lifelong impact on others through even the smallest of gestures – reaching out to a lonely person, mowing a widow’s lawn, taking a little extra time with the “troublemaker” kid in the Sunday School class you teach, or doing any one of a thousand other little things. Of course, not every act will pack a punch, but you never know which ones will.

And sometimes God will even take one of your offhand comments and drive it into a person’s heart. I’ve had people remark that something I said a few months previously stuck with them and helped them through a particular problem. When they tell me what I said, I sometimes don’t recall ever saying that. And once in a while, it doesn’t even sound like something I would say! But God uses it anyway. Go figure!

Tony Royko and I traded several more emails, but then his stopped. He had shared in one of his first emails that he had melanoma that had metastasized, so I suspect any reunion we have will, as he indicated in his first email, truly be in heaven.

What joy that will be to learn how God used you unwittingly in others’ lives and to be able to thank the countless people who helped you along the way, often without them realizing it! I hope this thought motivates you as much as it does me.

One of the Most Inspiring People I Know

Chris is a likeable, unassuming, down-to-earth building contractor.  I met him about six years ago in men’s group where he spent the whole meeting sitting silently in a corner with his hoodie pulled tightly around his face, hiding everything but his nose and mouth. Having raised a teen-aged son, I knew that any time a male sits with a hoodie obscuring most of his face, something is going on.

I invited Chris to breakfast, and the next week over IHOP pancakes, he told me his wife of 20 years just kicked him out and invited another man to move in. To make matters worse, she was putting all kinds of roadblocks to prevent him from seeing their kids. In order to provide for his ex-wife and his children, Chris generously signed over virtually all their assets and for a time ended up sleeping in his truck.

But this was just the beginning of his story. As we continued to meet over the next few months, I discovered other incredibly unfortunate aspects of his life:

·       His mother was an explosive bi-polar, and his father was a narcissist who constantly berated him.

·       His only sibling is a brother who is estranged from the family and has a college-aged daughter Chris has never even met.

·       His ex-wife did all she could to turn his children against Chris. He spent many thousands of dollars and almost two years battling to get custody of his middle-school-aged son.

If all these problems weren’t enough, on January 30, 2018 Chris was driving on a two-lane road when the driver in front of him decided to perform an illegal U-turn. Chris T-boned him and came within inches of being crushed to death. He suffered severe head injuries and, to this day, has to wear sunglasses both day and night to combat the constant severe glare.  Additionally, he frequently has trouble formulating his words because of the brain injury.

These conditions have affected his ability to secure construction jobs. As he puts it, Who wants to hire a contractor who can’t get his words out and always wears sunglasses like he’s a drug addict? Furthermore, he has other physical ailments like a torn rotator cuff and serious hip issues that make it hard for him to heft plywood sheets and roofing material for his construction work.

The other driver’s insurance company refused to settle the claim for nearly two years, and once they finally did, Chris didn’t even get enough to cover his huge medical costs. He has been forced to consider selling his work truck to pay off some of those bills.

The latest chapter is that Chris has been renovating his frail elderly parents’ house at his own expense so they can continue to live there. His reward? His dad turned him into the state, and Chris is currently under investigation for alleged elder abuse and stealing from his parents.

I don’t think I have ever known anyone who has had thing after thing after thing go so wrong like Chris has. If there is a “Society of Job” in heaven, Chris will be a shoo-in once he arrives.

The reason I describe him as one of the most inspiring and impressive guys I know is that in the six years we have been meeting, I have never heard him once express bitterness toward any of the many people who have so consistently mistreated him. Disappointment, frustration and mild anger, yes. But never bitterness. I have not met many people whose hearts are as pure and generous as Chris’. Furthermore, he has never questioned God’s goodness, and the personal sacrifices he has made to get custody of his son speak volumes to the young man about how much his dad loves him.

During our last call, Chris used the word blessed several times and once even referred to himself as very thankful and super-blessed. After all, he said, I should be dead, so everything else is great! He then added, His grace is sufficient. Chris is truly amazing! I promise you, I would not demonstrate half of Chris’ faith. And I don’t know too many others who would either. He is a genuinely remarkable man of God.

As a takeaway, I urge you to evaluate your current and past circumstances against Chris’ and also the degree to which you consider yourself as super-blessed as Chris does. He is a super role model!

A Must-See Streaming TV Series

According to answers.com there have been more than 1,000 movies made about Jesus. They range from blasphemous to spectacularly inspiring. Let me highlight a new TV series that deserves a spot at the very top of the list.

The Chosen is a brand-new, crowd-funded streaming TV series that debuted last year. The producers anticipate eight seasons.  Season 1 consists of eight episodes totaling about six hours, which cover just the very beginning of Jesus’ ministry. It would only take about 20 minutes to read aloud all the biblical passages covered in the first eight episodes. That leaves plenty of room for additional narrative. The producers are absolutely clear that they are presenting a fictional narrative, not a documentary, and certainly not Scripture. They create plausible backstories for many familiar characters including Nicodemus, Matthew, Mary Magdalene, and others. The writers don’t pretend that there is historical evidence for any of these made-up stories, but they have captured the both the spirit and heart of their subjects and the gospel message itself.

When evaluating the merits of any depiction of Jesus’ life, we must consider the two key issues:  how skilled the producers are at presenting their material and – most importantly – how accurately they portray Jesus. The Chosen clearly show Jesus as the Messiah, the Son of God and, indeed, God himself. So, theologically, it is rock-solid.

Many other films and TV shows about Jesus are also theologically sound, but they often come up short in their artistry. One thing that sets The Chosen apart is its incredibly compelling, non-cheesy portrayal of Jesus’ humanity, the best I’ve ever seen. He is warm, friendly, funny, and completely human. He smiles, plays with children, and even jokes around a bit.

Here’s one of my favorite mildly comical scenes. As the disciples are about to depart on their first trip, Simon (Peter) tells Jesus that, as the only married follower, he’s concerned about the home front while he’s gone, especially since his mother-in-law is seriously ill. Jesus goes to Simon’s house and, in a private conversation with Simon’s wife, tells her that he sees her and recognizes her role in letting Simon accompany him. But first, Jesus says, he has a few things to take care of, signaling that, as a gift to her, he will heal her mother. Plus, he says, normal Simon is difficult enough. You think I want to travel with a worried Simon? He then rolls his eyes skyward and bursts into a warm smile. I love it. This is the compassionate, warm, divine Jesus I want to know!

The producers have cast their material in a believable, accessible way. Too many biblical epics, especially from the 1950s and 1960s are guilty of a highly stilted style, complete with – of all things – British accents and dreamy-eyed characters who seem to float through life in some semi-mystical state. That’s not where I live. By contrast, The Chosen anchors its story and characters firmly in real life in such a way that I feel am right there as the story unfolds.

Some may quibble over how the script fills in some of the gaps, and there are a few minor points I might have handled somewhat differently. But I assure you, my “heresy detector” didn’t go off a single time. Plus, you will fall in love with the divine and yet incredibly human Jesus all over again.

Get The Chosen app, watch this series, and share it with your Christian and not-yet-Christian friends. It succeeds on all levels:  dramatic, artistic, theological, and devotional. And consider helping fund future seasons.  

Is It Ever OK to NOT Ask for Forgiveness?

Forgiveness is a core aspect of the Christian faith. Of course, Jesus’ forgiveness of our sins is what makes a relationship with God possible in the first place. And Jesus links my forgiveness of others and God’s forgiveness of my sins (Matt. 6:12-15). Furthermore, he teaches in Matt. 5:23-24 that, if we recognize someone’s offense against us, we should even interrupt the very act of worship to be reconciled, which requires asking for forgiveness. So, our default should always be to quickly forgive and seek forgiveness when necessary.

A few years ago, I had a thought-provoking insight on forgiveness. In my first healthcare job (Administrative Fellow at University of Michigan Health System), I assisted another entry-level executive, Mike, with one of his projects. After several meetings where I wondered whether he really knew what he was doing, I tried to distance myself from the project by going behind his back to the health system CEO to state my concerns and withdraw from the project. In hindsight, I see how cowardly and unprofessional that was. I should have at least clearly told Mike about my concerns and informed him I wanted to bow out.

Despite my inappropriate behavior, Mike and I remained on decent terms and eventually went our separate ways. About 15 years later, he told me he was coming through Atlanta and asked if I wanted to get together. After chatting a while over Waffle House pancakes, I blurted out an apology for my unwise and unkind action from 15 years prior. To my surprise, he had no idea what I was talking about and didn’t even remember the incident. Of course, my asking forgiveness was completely appropriate and in line with Jesus’ teaching, and I’m glad I did it.

I thought about this episode a few years later when I knew I would have the chance to meet up with a different former co-worker from my next job. To my shame, one time in an attempt at humor, I made a joke about one of his physical features. A few months later, he moved on to another job, and despite my stupidity, we stayed in touch professionally. Several years down the road, we discovered we would be attending the same conference. I wrestled with whether or not to dredge up my mistake and ask for his forgiveness.

In the end, I decided the more loving thing was to not bring it up. I concluded that if he did remember, rehashing the incident could compound the problem by opening an old wound, and if he didn’t, my apology would shine the spotlight right now on the very physical trait I’m sure he was already sensitive about. Either way, I would probably cause him discomfort. Apologizing would make me feel I had done my “Christian duty,” but doing so could further wound him.

In those very rare cases where you decide apologizing is worse than not apologizing, there are two ways to compensate for your transgression. First, vow to never repeat the offense – ever. Second, seek ways to affirm the other person in their strength areas in a genuine, non-kiss up way. Come to think of it, encouraging someone else is always a good idea, even when I haven’t offended them.

So, in 98% of cases, yes, apologize quickly and seek forgiveness. But carefully consider whether or not the result might be a net negative for the other person.

One Silver Lining of the Covid-19 Crisis

Covid-19 has changed everything for the entire country and most of the world. The medical and economic impacts have ravaged individual lives and the culture as a whole. History shows that watershed events – like localized natural disasters, 9/11, and now Covid-19 – shock people out of their complacency, causing them to reevaluate many aspects of their lives. And, after these events, church attendance typically blossoms – at least for a while.

Our current crisis presents an unusual dilemma for Christians. As Jesus-followers, we feel compelled to address others’ needs in whatever ways we can. This often means donating goods, supplies or cash. Or it can mean rolling up our sleeves to volunteer with disaster clean-up or help a not-for-profit address the crisis of the moment.

With Covid-19, though, millions of people – including many Christians – are facing economic stress and are in need of assistance themselves. And public health and political leaders have stressed “shelter in place” requirements, telling us the most significant contribution we can make is not venturing out, even to help. This obviously severely curtails volunteer opportunities.

Despite these limitations, there is a way every Christian can have an impact for the Kingdom. Back in 1998, Campus Crusade for Christ’s Worldwide Challenge magazine published an terrific article entitled “20 Questions You Can Use to Turn a Conversation to Spiritual Things.” I have referenced this piece dozens of times and distributed hundreds of copies.

Here are a couple of my favorite questions:

·       When you’re chatting with, say,  another parent at a soccer game, after you go through the typical questions about which neighborhood they live in, how long they’ve been in the area, etc., you can ask in a very low-key and natural way, “Do you guys go to church anywhere?” Their answer will give you great insights into their attitudes – open, indifferent or bitter – and can lead to tailored follow-up questions. If you’re likely to have ongoing interaction with them, there is no need to jump in during the first conversation. You can save this question for a subsequent conversation.

·       Here’s another good question:  “We’ve been friends for a while, but I’ve never had the chance to talk with you about what is really the most important factor in my life. Is it OK if I share that with you?”

These two are awesome, but this one next is custom-designed for our conversations in the Covid-19 era:

·       As indicated above, many people are at a particularly tender point where they are rethinking many aspects of their lives, including the spiritual implications of their current circumstances. So, the question is, “How has this situation affected the way you look at God?” What a great opening! Many people are asking themselves that very question. Their response will give you a window into where they are spiritually and potentially lead to a meaningful conversation.

As we continue to walk through the pandemic and its aftermath, let’s keep looking for creative ways to address the needs of those around us in whatever realms we can, both the tangible and the spiritual.

If You're Married, You MUST Do This

On a recent Focus on the Family radio broadcast, marriage counselor Dave Carder suggested an intriguing communication exercise for couples. Every morning for 30 days, he suggested, each of you should write down something you like about your spouse, and then share it with him or her at the end of the day.

My immediate thought was, “Great idea, but 30 seems like a lot. I certainly like lots of things about my wife, but 30 might be a stretch.” When I shared this idea with Annette, she suggested an alternative. “What if we modify it to 20 things I like about you, and 10 things about you that drive me crazy? Maybe we could do two days on, one day off.” (Her reaction reflected #25 on my list of things I like about her:  her sense of humor.)

We went ahead with this exercise, and I must say it’s been one of the best things we’ve ever done. I found myself thinking all day about both what I had written for that day – looking forward to sharing it – and pondering what I would say the next. Spending a month thinking about all the things you like about your wife is an awesome experience!

Midway through the month, I started to fear I might “run dry.” Then I realized I could “buy” several days if I started listing things she is not:  she is not high maintenance; she is not a gossip; she is not a troublemaker; she is not a “shopper.” (I know this last one makes me the envy of half the men in the country.)

Perhaps the most interesting aspect was how surprised we were by some of the items the other person listed. After being married for 38 years, I heard Annette verbalize some positive things about me that had never even occurred to me.

And it turns out that the most surprising thing she said about me didn’t show up until the very last day when she told me I don’t have a mean bone in my body. She said she has never seen me do anything to intentionally harm anyone. I pushed back a bit and reminded her to the many times I would complain – occasionally bitterly – about some of the jerks in my life. She agreed that I have honed that particular skill pretty well, but she went on to point out that, despite my negative feelings, she has never seen me take action to hurt them. I had never thought of that. What an encouraging observation from the person who knows me better than anyone else!

Interestingly, my #30 comment about her was also an obvious one that I’m surprised I hadn’t tagged sooner – the fact that she feels secure enough in our marriage to be able to express her anger toward me knowing it wouldn’t kill our relationship. I’m thrilled she feels that safe.

And it turns out we didn’t have to worry about running out of ideas. We each even came up with one or two “bonus” items, beyond the 30.

So, I highly recommend this exercise. Give it a try! By the way, you can also do this with your kids or anyone else. Tell them one thing you like about them every day for 30 days.

Two Reasons I Don't Do New Year's Resolutions

Well, here we are in the fourth week of the new year, and undoubtedly the majority of New Year’s resolutions have gone the way of the Sony Walkman. A recent US News and World Report cites an 80% New Year’s resolution failure rate. If you made some, how are you doing?

I’ve never been big on the practice, and now, for two reasons, I never even start down that road.

1. Many New Year’s resolutions are made with little thought

I was guilty of a parallel transgression as a first year Cru/Campus Crusade for Christ staff member. We were getting ready for our annual student Christmas Conference, and my monthly communication with my support team was due. Naturally, I discussed the conference and asked for their prayers. I had just heard a talk about praying specifically, so I yanked some figures out of the air regarding the number of students attending, the number of people we would get to share Christ with during the conference, etc. But, . . . I had devoted almost no thought and even less prayer to the numbers. I don’t even remember praying particularly diligently for these requests myself. That’s how many people formulate New Year’s resolutions.

Meaningful change comes with thoughtful planning and realistic (i.e., reasonable and modest) expectations. Yet many people haphazardly generate lists of a dozen or more poorly-thought-through resolutions, and they – predictably – fail. Few people succeed at going from zero to sixty in four seconds.

2.  The most profound changes usually come when God teaches me something I didn’t even realize I needed to learn

I’m all for planning and personal goals. But over the years, I’ve learned some of my most significant lessons unexpectedly when God painfully spotlighted one of my shortcomings. A few years ago, I got into an argument with a beloved family member and pushed and pushed my point much further than I should have, damaging the relationship. Although we had gotten into scuffles before and I knew in my head I should have backed off, I didn’t. Subsequently, God made it painfully obvious how badly I had messed up. I deeply regretted my folly, and I vowed never to travel that path again.

Guess what? This is a great picture of what true repentance is. In a recent sermon, our youth pastor Troy Gambrell referenced Charles Spurgeon’s three elements of repentance: 

·         Discovering your shortcoming

·         Mourning your sin

·         Resolving to never repeat it

Troy pointed out that, although repentance has gotten a terrible reputation in our culture, we should embrace it as the means and message of good news that follows the bad news about our sin. If our goal is merely to stop bad behavior, we start down the dark road of legalism, judgmentalism, and self-condemnation. But if our goal is spiritual transformation, we should see repentance as a vital tool God employs in our upward calling in Christ (Phil 3:14).

So, I’m happy to keep planning and setting goals, but I’m (eventually) delighted after God reveals a major flaw and provides the grace that helps further conform me to the image of Christ (2 Cor. 3:18). Hebrews 1 - 7explains how Jesus is superior to the prophets, angels, Moses, Joshua, and the Old Testament priesthood. In the same vein, I would suggest that repentance is superior to New Year’s resolutions.

When You Unexpectedly Have a Ministry to Yourself

Every speaker and teacher I know agrees that organizing their thoughts into a talk or written piece leaves them feeling they learned more than their audiences did. I’m no exception.

At this time of year, we tend to reflect on the previous twelve months. As I did a quick scan of my 2018 blog posts (www.glennpearson.co/new-blog), I thought all of them had something of value. Of course I did, or I wouldn’t have written them 😊. But as an undergraduate English major trained to notice literary patterns, I recognized some inter-related themes in four of my blogs:

• January 24 – The Absolute Best Bible Passage for Resolving an Age-Old Debate – References Daniel 3:17-18 where the pagan king Nebuchadnezzar threatened to incinerate Daniel’s three friends if they didn’t worship the golden image he had set up – “If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it . . . .  But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.”

• July 19 – got envy? – Tells of my envy over seeing people having the luxury of running when I had to drive to work, but then my equal envy when I was the one running in the park when my business was slow and saw people on their way to productive jobs

• November 15 – When God Uses You to Answer Someone Else’s Prayer but Doesn’t Answer Yours – Relates the story how God supernaturally allowed me to establish a mentoring relationship with a young man at LA Fitness who specifically prayed for someone to take him under his wing as he was literally driving to the gym that very morning

• December 12 – Contentment:  2 Obvious But Life-Changing Ideas – Reminds us of two things:

  ·   Contentment consists not in great wealth but in few wants

  ·   Since God controls absolutely everything, loves me completely, and knows what he’s doing, I have exactly what he wants me to have

Here’s how these four fit together. I see others’ favorable circumstances but envy them (the envy blog), and I rejoice when God uses me to bless someone else but wonder why some of my prayers aren’t answered (the blog about using me to answer someone else’s prayer), resulting in more envy. The antidote is to ponder Daniel’s three friends’ faith as they recognize God can do the absolutely impossible if he wants to and to emulate their astounding commitment to trust him even if he chooses a different path for them. Internalizing these three lessons leads me to contentment as I see that my circumstances reflect exactly what God wants me to have.

Ironically, literally one hour before I posted the contentment blog, I received some very disappointing ministry-related news. God graciously reminded me of these four blogs and, although I was still disappointed, he allowed me to exhale and trust his loving sovereignty. So, I’m thankful I had the chance to unexpectedly minister to myself 😊. But of course, I am ultimately thankful to God for driving these lessons into my heart and allowing me to live them out.