One of the Most Inspiring People I Know

Chris is a likeable, unassuming, down-to-earth building contractor.  I met him about six years ago in men’s group where he spent the whole meeting sitting silently in a corner with his hoodie pulled tightly around his face, hiding everything but his nose and mouth. Having raised a teen-aged son, I knew that any time a male sits with a hoodie obscuring most of his face, something is going on.

I invited Chris to breakfast, and the next week over IHOP pancakes, he told me his wife of 20 years just kicked him out and invited another man to move in. To make matters worse, she was putting all kinds of roadblocks to prevent him from seeing their kids. In order to provide for his ex-wife and his children, Chris generously signed over virtually all their assets and for a time ended up sleeping in his truck.

But this was just the beginning of his story. As we continued to meet over the next few months, I discovered other incredibly unfortunate aspects of his life:

·       His mother was an explosive bi-polar, and his father was a narcissist who constantly berated him.

·       His only sibling is a brother who is estranged from the family and has a college-aged daughter Chris has never even met.

·       His ex-wife did all she could to turn his children against Chris. He spent many thousands of dollars and almost two years battling to get custody of his middle-school-aged son.

If all these problems weren’t enough, on January 30, 2018 Chris was driving on a two-lane road when the driver in front of him decided to perform an illegal U-turn. Chris T-boned him and came within inches of being crushed to death. He suffered severe head injuries and, to this day, has to wear sunglasses both day and night to combat the constant severe glare.  Additionally, he frequently has trouble formulating his words because of the brain injury.

These conditions have affected his ability to secure construction jobs. As he puts it, Who wants to hire a contractor who can’t get his words out and always wears sunglasses like he’s a drug addict? Furthermore, he has other physical ailments like a torn rotator cuff and serious hip issues that make it hard for him to heft plywood sheets and roofing material for his construction work.

The other driver’s insurance company refused to settle the claim for nearly two years, and once they finally did, Chris didn’t even get enough to cover his huge medical costs. He has been forced to consider selling his work truck to pay off some of those bills.

The latest chapter is that Chris has been renovating his frail elderly parents’ house at his own expense so they can continue to live there. His reward? His dad turned him into the state, and Chris is currently under investigation for alleged elder abuse and stealing from his parents.

I don’t think I have ever known anyone who has had thing after thing after thing go so wrong like Chris has. If there is a “Society of Job” in heaven, Chris will be a shoo-in once he arrives.

The reason I describe him as one of the most inspiring and impressive guys I know is that in the six years we have been meeting, I have never heard him once express bitterness toward any of the many people who have so consistently mistreated him. Disappointment, frustration and mild anger, yes. But never bitterness. I have not met many people whose hearts are as pure and generous as Chris’. Furthermore, he has never questioned God’s goodness, and the personal sacrifices he has made to get custody of his son speak volumes to the young man about how much his dad loves him.

During our last call, Chris used the word blessed several times and once even referred to himself as very thankful and super-blessed. After all, he said, I should be dead, so everything else is great! He then added, His grace is sufficient. Chris is truly amazing! I promise you, I would not demonstrate half of Chris’ faith. And I don’t know too many others who would either. He is a genuinely remarkable man of God.

As a takeaway, I urge you to evaluate your current and past circumstances against Chris’ and also the degree to which you consider yourself as super-blessed as Chris does. He is a super role model!